I was out running recently on a frigidly cold, dark night and I realized something that made kind of a profound impact on me. There are stretches on my runs where there are no street lights at all and woods all around and it creates a kind of unadulterated isolation that is hard to find. Add to that the meditative state that running brings about and being bundled up in the winter gear and you begin to feel a unique connection with God and the immediate world around you. I often do one more thing that may sound kind of crazy, but takes the experience to a whole other level. When I am on those dark stretches, in an attempt to create as atrementous and environment as possible, I CLOSE MY EYES. Yup, I actually close my eyes while I'm running on a dark deserted road. Now, it's not usually for more than a few seconds; Although, I do sometimes push myself and see how long I can keep my eyes closed before I open them again.
So, back to the thing that I realized. As I closed my eyes, bundled up in my winter running gear, on a dark stretch of isolated road, I realized that I was in a very exclusive situation. I wondered, how many people were there on earth at that very moment, in sub freezing temperatures, bundled up in winter running gear, running down a deserted road with no other humans in sight, with eyes closed? I kept thinking, "There are only a handful of people on earth doing this same exact thing right now. Maybe, I could even count them on the fingers of one hand." Percentage wise, there were probably way less than 1% of people on earth doing what I was doing at that moment. Now, there were probably plenty of people doing everything I was doing, EXCEPT the closing of the eyes. The closing of the eyes thing? That set me apart. Why? Because it was crazy... kind of. It didn't make sense. It's not something that you're supposed to do. By going that last step of closing my eyes, I ahd created a unique isolation that a fraction of the people on this earth have experienced. Then I started thinking about how many times, doing something that you're not supposed to do, or doing something considered crazy by others, does the same thing for other people. Sure, the experience can be negative or positive depending on what you're doing, but doing those types of things is what gives people unique and transcendent experiences in life. Something as simple as closing your eyes while running on a cold fall day, can create this phenomenon. At least it did for me.
Anyway, it struck me and I want to do more things like that. More simple, yet out of the ordinary things that give me that take me to that place.
All I could think of while reading this, is how scary that would be. Not the closing your eyes part, but the running alone in the dark part. Being a woman, the fear of being attacked is the first thing I think of. Sad, but true. I suppose it is fear that keeps a lot of people from being different, or trying different, crazy things. I have had many times when I have had thoughts about the world during different types of experiences, and I understand how you felt, on some level, at least. It can be very surreal. I suppose that rock climbing or bungee jumping would give you a similar experience, but I am fine with just doing the little things :)
ReplyDeleteYeah, I understand the scary part, especially for women. I always cringe a little when Joy says she is going to go out running in the dark. Like you said, even doing just little safe things, we are sometimes caught up in very unique moments and sometimes we don't even appreciate it. It's like this little miracle moment that God has given us.
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